Do not educate your children to obey you, educate them for good decisions

As fathers and mothers, our primary responsibility is to see to the well-being of our children. Taking care of their emotional and physical development, as well as educating them, are the challenges and opportunities that we will face every day. During your first years of life, we will be your guides and those you turn to for help or guidance. Letter to my daughter, on International Women’s Day.


But also as parents, we must prepare them for the real world and the situations that may arise in their lives. For this reason, it is important to educate them not so that they obey us, but so that they are capable of making good decisions themselves .


As parents, we will always seek the best for our children. Surely if we had the ability to choose a “superpower” for mom or dad, many of us would always want to protect them from everything that could harm them, or perhaps be that voice that shows them the safe path. Strollers and pushchairs for babies 2022: 19 strollers that are trending.


However, we must keep in mind that although we are their main caregivers and providers during their first years of life, we are a kind of guides and teachers, who will teach them everything we can , until the day comes when they begin to become independent and eventually take flight.

Perhaps the whole business of “leaving the nest” or the parents’ house is something very far away for many, especially for those of us who have small children who still depend on us for most things. But the truth is that from an early age we must educate them so that tomorrow they will be happy and safe adults .

Why is it so important that they learn to make decisions?

Educating our children from childhood so that they are capable of making decisions will turn them into autonomous and competent adults. Starting to make decisions is something that helps them begin to mature and shows them that they are capable of choosing between one thing or another, and that doing so will have an impact -big or small- on their future .

As adults, we make decisions every day, some as simple as choosing what to eat or what to wear, and some more complex, such as whether or not to accept a job offer. With this, I mean that decisions are in our daily life and it is something we do constantly , therefore, it is important that our children start doing it too.

How can we educate them to make good decisions?

Now, for our children to make good decisions, it is essential to educate them in values. Knowing about responsibility, generosity, kindness or honesty are some of the key values ??so that little by little they are able to learn to make the right decisions.

A simple way to start teaching our children to make decisions is by asking them simple questions or giving examples of what would happen if they choose one thing or another. When we teach them, for example, that their actions have consequences, they will understand that they must think carefully about what they do before acting .

An extremely important part of this process is to begin to give them the opportunity to decide. At first it can be difficult for us, because we already know how to act and what will happen if we choose this or that, but we must allow them to choose too . In this way, we will show them that their voice and opinion are important to us.

But in addition to beginning to express their opinions or preferences, giving them the opportunity to decide will allow them to make mistakes and thus learn from their mistakes . We can set an example of this too, since if we make a decision that in the end does not turn out to be the best, we can explain to them what happened and the alternative that would have been ideal . Or, make them part of our moment of decision and explain to them why we chose one thing and not another.

The most important thing: teach them to think, not think for them

The most important part of letting them make decisions is teaching them to think for themselves and not just obey because Mom or Dad thinks something is best . If we make all the decisions for them, when the time comes for them to do so, they probably won’t know what to do or how to act.

Let ‘s remember to work on their self-esteem so that our children are self-confident and know that they have the ability to choose . Little by little and making them participate also in moments in which decisions are made within the family, they will learn the bases for being adults capable of making good decisions in the future.